Ministering Around the Wrong Way: The Hidden Trap for Pastors
Joel Cave shared openly on social media about his experiences in ministry. What he described is the heartbreaking reality many pastors experience. Most do not have the profile or platform that Joel has, so it often remains hidden from public view. A big thanks to Joel for sharing this so others can see behind the curtain of what is, sadly, a common occurrence in ministry.
It is easy to mistake “success” in ministry for health and the favour of God. Leadership is often framed as moving the church to the next stage or the next level. What is not always considered is: at what cost?
Joel identified pride as an issue. As a counsellor and leadership coach, what I often see behind this is that a person’s identity has become fused with their role and the outcomes of that role. Success in the role begins to drive us rather than our love for Jesus, because success tells us we are significant, special, and worthwhile. It is understandably intoxicating.
We can tell ourselves that we are serving the church and sacrificing for Jesus, when in reality we may be serving a deeper need to feel worthy, significant, and capable. Yet these things can only truly come from knowing who we are in Jesus. Ministry begins with remaining in Him and in His love (John 15). We may know this logically and theologically, but unless it becomes our lived experience we will always find a substitute — a counterfeit (Jer. 2:13).
We also tend to confuse our calling with the role. As a result, we begin to believe that whatever we experience in the role is simply what God wants for us or just part of ministry. The sad reality is that many of the detrimental dynamics Joel described are common in ministry, but we fail to see them because we have labelled them as “normal ministry.”
Here is the real danger: if the enemy can convince you that the role itself is the call of God on your life, he can then get you to submit to the harmful outcomes of that role and minister yourself into an early grave.
You may tell yourself:
“This is just a stretching season.”
“I just need to push through.”
“It will be better when…”
Often these are signs that something is out of alignment at a deeper level.
The answer is not simply taking time off or doing things that bring you joy. Those can help, but if we want pastors to remain healthy and resilient for the long term, we must realign ourselves and our ministry at a deeper level.
We come back to recognising that we are branches drawing life from Jesus the Vine — our Creator, Sustainer, and the One who produces fruit through us. From that place we can relate to the role, and to others, far more healthily. It is there that we truly discover that Jesus’ yoke is easy and His burden is light.
Thanks Joel for your openness. Many are praying for your recovery, healing, and for restoration in your relationships with those closest to you.
If any of this this resonates with you and you would like to explore this further, I have recently released two resources on wellbeing and thriving in pastoral leadership:
The Pastoral Trap: The Biggest Pitfall in Ministry (free webinar)
https://thrivingchurcheshq.com/the-pastoral-trap/
Who Wants to Be a Pastor? — The Leadership Crisis We Cannot Ignore (white paper)
